Yes, the bastard child of the Splatterhouse series. This is another one of those games that really doesn’t take itself too seriously. Of course, that much is obvious from looking at the cute super-deformed protagonist. Even with an axe and a hockey mask, he still manages to be cute. And the whole game is just as silly. Well, not incredibly silly, but it’s silly at various points. Anyway, you’re a dead guy who’s rescuing his girlfriend, and in doing so walks perpetually to the right, and cuts up all kinds of possessed objects and demons on the way to the pathetically easy showdown with the big pumpkin thing and the really cool ending. There’s even a “Winners Don’t Use Drugs” screen in the credits. How damned cool is that?

Everything’s complete, though it doesn’t look great. Stop complaining.

• Splatter House - Wanpaku Graffiti (J)
• CRC-16: 189A
• CRC-32: B7EEB48B
• SHA-1: C5E4488C315C45B5A33CE2CD35B88D1AC4DDB061