『マチョビタンA』 = Machovitan A [I think vitan is from "vitamin"]
『マチョビタンB』 = Machovitan B
『マチョビタンC』 = Machovitan C
『マチョビタンD』 = Machovitan D
『マッチョンEX』 = Machon EX
マチョビタン is most likely a play on the name of the energy drink
リポビタンD . マッチョン is probably something similar, but I don't know which brand name it would be.
Sounds like most of those item descriptions have been translated now. Is that right? Anyway, just in case...
素手で戦うよりはマシ!
Beats fighting with your bare hands!
回って、回って、回って、回るぅ!
Spin, spin, spin, SPIN!
Vは勝利の頭文字・・・サインはV!
"V" is for "Victory" -- and the sign is "V"!
振り回すが一番!!
Great for swinging!!
走る、走る・・・フォ~スが走る!
Run, run -- run goes the force!
全身でブイブイ振り回せ!!
Put your body into swinging it around and being a pain in the ass!
92年ベスト・オブ・ジ・イヤ~受賞!
Winner of the "Best of '92" award!
これ以上・・・望むモノなどあるものか!
What more could you possibly ask for?
シンプル・イズ・ベスト!
Simple Is Best
熱いハ~ト、前後へ突き抜けろ!!
Burning heart, pierce straight through!
Y字型、人文字作れば、バンザイだ!
Make a "Y" with your body and you get "BANZAI"!
本当にコブシが火をふいたぜ!
The fist really spat out flames!
だ・ぶ・る? なるほど、分身の事だ!
"Double"? Oh, I get it! An alter ego!
無敵・・・とは、いかないまでも・・・
Makes you just about invincible...almost.
超強力につき、取り扱い注意!
May cause ESP. Use only as directed.
(Literally, "Use with precaution due to ESP")
火球は続く~よ、どこまでもォ!!
Flames! They keep going, and going, and going...
ズバリ、初心者向け!
For beginners only. Period!
振り回すよりも、「投げる」が一番!
This one's better to "throw" than swing!
カユイ所に手が届く、こいつは、マル!
Just the thing for reaching those itchy spots!
ブ~メラン、ブ~メラン、ブ~メラン・・・
Boomerang, boomerang, boomerang...
魔法剣と言えば・・・そのモノ、ズバリ!
A magical sword! It's exactly what it sounds like.
前進! 前進! また前進!!
Forward! Onward! Forward some more!!
なんでもかんでも、ブチ壊せ!!
Destroy the crap out of anything under the sun.
説明不要、知る人ぞ知る、最高の剣!
A sword-of-swords for connoisseurs that needs no introduction.
女性専用ではないけれど・・・
It's not EXACTLY girls-only, but...
天まで届く!? その威力!
Has the fearsome power to reach the heavens above?!
キってダメなら、突いてみろ!
Can't cut it? Then stick it!
バカに出来ないキレ味がウケてます。
Its superior sharpness is nothing to be trifled with.
剣の事が、本当に分かる剣・・・です。
It's a sword that knows what it means to be...a sword.
買って納得、結果に満足!
Buy it and you'll agree -- the results with satisfy you!
暗黒の剣・・・まさにヤミ剣!
A pitch black sword. It's, well, a sword of darkness!
食べて良し、投げて良しのスゴイ奴!
Good to eat! Good to throw! This thing is AWESOME!
ドハデな弾が、あなたを救う!
The ridiculously flamboyant bullet that will save your life!
火の鳥が、幸せを運んで来ます。
An island of flames comes bearing happiness!
飛んで、飛んで・・・回って、回るぅ。
Fly, fly! Spin, spin!
飛ばしちゃダメだ、弾は回して使え!
Don't shoot this bullet -- send the sucker spinnin'!
弾が違います、キレが違います。
A bullet? Nope. A scrap? Nope.
上から読んでも下から読んでも弾幕弾!
Read it forward or backward and it's still "artillery barrage artillery"!
こんなモノに降られちゃ大変さ!
Something like this falls on you and you're screwed, dude!
ズガガガッと揺れて、コロッといくぞ。
Shake it, shake it, clickety-clack! Let the good times roll!
キノコの皮をナメして作った鎧。
Armor made from tanned muchroom hide.
名工ソラムの試作品。
Experimental product by the master craftsman Solam.
リングプルをまとめて作った鎧。
Armor made from a bunch of pull tabs.
王冠を集めて作った鉄の鎧。
Armor made from a bottle cap collection.
軽さに味のある普及品!
A tastefully light commonplace item.
上質に出会えた喜びの一品!
An article graced with good quality!
敵にやさしく、セ~フティバトル!
Go easy on your opponents -- battle safely!
名工ソラムの新作品、マルです。
A new product from the master creaftsman Solam. Top-knotch!
もう他には、何もいらない!
You won't need anything alse ever again!
新素材、毒に強い、ドクキラ~配合!
New and improved PoisonOut(TM) compound! It's tough on poison!
やっぱり毒は、イヤだと思う・・・
Yeah, see poison, well, sucks.
毒をしっかりシャットアウト!
Blocks out poison!
麻痺攻撃に、小さな安心。
Keeps you kinda safe from paralysis.
麻痺に利く・・・ただ、それだけがいい。
Effective against paralysis...sounds good enough to me.
どうしても、麻痺はイヤという人へ・・・
Foe people who hate being paralyzed...
混乱するのは、自分の弱さ?
Confusion getting you down?
混乱しないための新登場です!
NEW! Stop the confusion!
もう、混乱なんかさせません!!
No more nasty confusion for you, my friend!!
フレイムスト~ンを動かせるぜ!
Dude! You can move flame stones!
アクアスト~ンを動かせるぜ!
Sweet! You can move aqua stones!
カギがあるなら、使う場所もあるハズ。
If there's a key, there must be a place to use it.
暗がりに、明かりをともす便利屋さん。
This little helper lights the way in dark places.
ジシン、雷、火事、ナマズってね。
Earthquakes, snow, fires, leprosy -- that sort of thing.
毒キノコに、さわれるようになるぞ。
Lets you touch poison mushrooms.
ヨルダの石を持てるようになるぞ。
Lets you hold the Stone of Yorda.
頭があると言う事は・・・???
If there's a head, then there must be...?
どこかにハメる場所があるのでは?
It seems kinda obvious that there's a place to set this, doesn't it?
扉を開くためのハグルマのようです。
It looks like a gear for opening a door.
中を見ちゃいけません!!
No peeking inside!!
自然と体力が回復していくスゴイ奴!
This bad boy makes your stamina regenerate on its own!
みんな狂っちゃえ!
Everybody get CRAZY!
体を小さく、小さく・・・小さく、ね!
Makes your body smaller, and smaller... Get the picture?
魔王ハワ~ドを倒す気なら・・・
If you want to take out the dark lord Howard...
水中でも息が出来るアリのミツです!
Ant jelly! Lets you breathe underwater!
盗人から武器や防具を守ります!
Protect your weapons and armor from thieving scumbags!
無敵になる隠しアイテムだぜ!
An concealable item with no equal!
無敵になる隠しアイテムだぜ!
An concealable item with no equal!
HPを「少し」回復するぞ!
Restores "a few" HP!
HPを「まあまあ」回復するよ。
Restores "a fair amount of" HP!
HPを「かなり」回復すんぞォ。
Restores "a good deal of" HP!
HPを全回復しちゃいます。
Restores your HP totally, to the max, dude!
なんと、毒を解毒する毒です。
It's a poison that cures poison! INSANE!
麻痺した体をリフレッシュ!!
Refresh your paralyzed self!!
ちょっと、混乱したかなぁと言う時に。
For those times when you feel a little confused.
この薬で直らないのは、Aの字だけ!
The only thing this drug can't cure is a frown!
(I'm guessing Aの字 means への字, which means a few things, including a frown)
あったら恐い・・・こんな便利な矢。
This arrow is so convenient...it's scary.
死ぬのはイヤだ・・・恐い・・・でしょ?
Dying is bad...it's scary...don't you think?
敵を全滅・・・とは、いかないけど・・・
Completely just about annihilate your opponents!
一度、味を覚えるとヤメらんない!
You can't stop once you taste the flavor!
便利なモノは使う、これ当たり前!
Conveniences are meant to be used. This one's a no-brainer!
もう・・・★★パッドはいらない!
Ladies! No more need to pad you-know-where!
(The ★★s probably stand for ブラ, or maybe even "nipple stars".)
とにかく、無敵なんです!
It's the best. Let's leave it at that.
本当に、敵を動きを止めちゃうんです!
It'll really put a stop to those enemies of yours.
そして、誰もいなくなった・・・
And then there were none...
お気に入りの武器に、愛情1本!
A dose of affection for your favorite weapons!
(Not sure about this one. 愛情1本 is a tagline for an energy drink -- I can't find whether it has a "normal" meaning.)
使用上の注意をよくお読み下さい。
Please read all warnings and directions carefully before use.
ド~ンと一発のつもりが・・・
Meant for a single BOOMing shot...
HTH